The Frosting Conumdrum
by captainbartholomew
Summary: They had been in odd situations before but this one literally took the cake.  A response to Claire O' Macks writing contest. One-shot.


***a/n: This is a one shot for Claire O' Mack's writing contest! Check it out if you haven't done so yet! Special thanks to caylender for editing this cuz she is amazing! :)**

**Sadly I do not own the wrestlers or their families, Read On…**

The Frosting Conundrum

They had found themselves in odd situations before, but this one really took the cake. Literally.

"Dude, do you know how to frost a cake? I have no clue how to frost a cake," John Cena whispered to his best friend, Randy Orton, as the two sat in one of the most awkward situations they had been in in a while.

Sure, there was that time that John suggested they go sky diving. Or the time before that when Randy had made John climb an active volcano while in Hawaii just for kicks. It was even more awkward than when their wives had forced them to take dance lessons as part of a romantic getaway and the two had to be dance partners to demonstrate things to the class. John wound up being the woman, which was degrading for him, and Sam and Liz had laughed to no end after that.  
>But none of that even compared to the torture, the pure uncanny horror of- of- of… cooking class!<p>

"We're screwed!" cried Cena, beginning to pace back and forth behind the little counter that served as their station to make scrumptious delicacies. "We're never going to get out of here! I can't do this; I can't do this; I can't do this!"

Cena began to hyperventilate as Orton pityingly looked at his best friend who was breaking down over baked goods. Randy chuckled at John letting a smirk play across his lips.

"Now is NOT the time to laugh Randy! Do you want to get out of here alive or do you want Frenchie over there to tear your insides out and use them on chicken parmesan?" John asked rather frightened of the French chef who was watching the class. Randy shook his head and sighed while letting John freak out a little more. He couldn't help but think how this had all started just because of some silly challenge from the Divas.

(XXXX)

1 Week Earlier…  
>"No I'm telling you girls, Chef Charlot is amazing!" Natalya bragged to the other Divas backstage at a show the WWE was doing in St. Louis at the time. "It is a lot of hard work though."<p>

"It certainly sounds like it Nattie," answered a smiling Eve. "What did you guys make in class this week anyway?"

"Homemade macaroni and cheese, oh girls, it was to die for! Chef Charlot knows how to make it all healthy for you, too, so you don't have to work extra hard to burn off unwanted calories," Natalya explained with a smile on her face. As the Divas continued the mindless chatter, the two biggest WWE faces came up behind them to join the conversation while waiting for their cue to go to the ring.

"Ladies," Randy greeted all of them giving a nod of his head. The Divas all turned and acknowledged the Viper back. John though who was now standing alongside Natalya, listening to her stories of the famous Chef Charlot was oddly silent. But from what Randy could see, John was working a plan in his mind, which for Randy, meant that he was going to be dragged into some outright dangerous adventure, no thanks to John Anthony Felix Cena.

"So Chef Charlot, huh?" John questioned, crossing his broadly muscular arms. Natalya nodded at the Leader of the CeNation waiting for more to come out of his mouth. "This cooking class sounds easy enough, Nattie. I bet Randy and I could do it."

"John," Randy moaned. He had known his friend was going to say something stupid, and Cena had just confirmed his suspicions.

"No, Randy, if he thinks the two of you can handle it, then the two of you can handle it," Natalya replied with a gleam in her eyes. "Plus I'm sure Sam and Liz would love for you, two, cook them dinner sometime. So what do you boys say, want to come with me to class next week?"

John looked to Randy while Randy huffed at the ground not knowing what the heck to expect.

"Chef Charlot would love to have you," Natalya emphasized again.

"Fine, we'll do it," Randy answered unaware of the fate he had just sealed for him and John Cena.

(XXXX)

Yep, this was how they got to be here staring at a cake that was burnt to a crisp because John had forgotten to turn on the timer. The frosting looked more chunky than Campbell's Chunky soup since Randy had not whisked it but instead pounded it. Natalya stared at them from across the room and gave a small wave at the two of them. Randy returned the wave and went back to trying to frost the cake while John was having his total and complete mental breakdown on the other side of him. He had been muttering about some traumatic childhood incident with carrots and carrot cake. However, Randy knew better than to ask.

As Chef Charlot, who John and Randy had soon learned was a man not a woman like some would think, made his rounds, Randy couldn't help but feel nervous about what he would say about the cake.

Natalya waited patiently, watching Randy squirm as Chef Charlot made his way to the table that held the destroyed cake. It would be entertaining to watch the French man scream at the two pro wrestlers. And it would teach them the lesson that cooking wasn't so easy.

"I must say Mr. Orton and Mr. Cena, this is a rather unique cake!" exclaimed Chef Charlot, winking at Randy. Randy felt a red hot blush creep across his face while looking down at a mangled piece of a bake good.

"You could say that again," John muttered next to Randy. The thing was charred and only one half of it was covered in frosting because Randy hadn't had enough to cover the whole cake.

"May I try a piece?" Chef Charlot questioned. Randy and John both raised their eyebrows at the French man as though he was mad. "It looks absolutely scrumptious."

"Go ahead," Randy answered while cutting him a piece and handing it him. John was making gaging noises in the background while Randy tried to wrap his little head around the fact that this man was eating that devastation of a cooking experiment. Natalya on the other side of the room couldn't believe it either.

"Delicious, you boys should come to cooking class more often," the Chef declared and walked away, leaving the boys stunned and unable to move. "I hope to see you back here again. Alright Miss Natalya, let's see what you have come up with this week."

Chef Charlot said as he moved onto the rest of his students.

"Well, that was unexpected," John said while rubbing his hand across the back of his head in confusion. Randy nodded in unison. "Come on; let's get out of here before he makes us cook something else. I saw a Dick's Sporting Goods down the road from here; maybe they have that new Ryan Grant jersey that I've been looking for."

With that, John dashed out the door as fast as his well-toned legs could carry him. Randy followed suit not wanting to take a cooking class ever again. As he looked over his shoulder, he could Chef Charlot screaming at Natalya in French. Randy shook his head feeling sorry for his friend and scrambled out of the classroom not wanting to face the wrath of the French cook with the weirdest of tastes.

But if you were Randy or Natalya and if you had learned anything from that day, it was that this situation had really taken the cake. But if you were John, you had learned that from now Liz was the only one going to do the cooking in the house unless it involved anything microwavable or made in twenty minutes or less. He never wanted to relive the horror of the frosting conundrum ever, ever again.


End file.
